Steven Vigil didn’t steal that car. He just never got around to returning it.

​The Vigils rolled into a Las Vegas, New Mexico Red Lobster recently, their five-month-old daughter in tow. The young family was seated at one of the fine eatery’s comfy booths and prepared themselves for a mighty feast. Soon, though, restaurant employees realized something was terribly awry. The Vigils appeared to be cataclysmically intoxicated, so-much-so workers observed them repeatedly “passing out” at the table and hardly able to speak.

When a server refused to ring in the Vigil’s order for more spirits, the denial didn’t appear to make a dent in the couple’s collective buzz. Linda Vigil was soon spotted shaking and dangling the baby by the arms, trying to make her dance as proud papa looked on with an approving, albeit chemical-stained, smile. Once the couple had soaked up enough of the chain restaurant’s ambience, they got ready to leave. It was at that juncture when concerned Red Lobster’s workers observed the wobbly parents toting the child in her car seat as it swung and bumped into chairs, doors and walls.

Red Lobster staff offered to call a cab for the couple, but that gesture was shot down.

A waitress then summoned authorities. Officers arrived in the restaurant parking lot to find the Vigils severely FUBRed. They also found Steven Vigil trying to drive off in a red Ford Mustang that had been reported stolen in late May.

Steven told police he had borrowed the vehicle from an Alcoholics Anonymous buddy. He added that he and his buddy had recently got into a spat and that was likely why his AA chum had now reported the car thieved. Steven then denied being drunk to officers, instead insisting his speech was slurry and eyes glossy because he had recently been released from the hospital and was now on prescription meds.

When officers proceeded to inspect the innards of the stolen vehicle, they found a dozen bottles of prescription pills as well as baby bottles mixed in with trash.

Both Vigils were booked with child abuse and stealing a car. Linda Vigil was also hit with one count of concealing her identity. As for their daughter, she was taken to Christus St. Vincent Regional Medical Center, where medical staff received her filthy and starving. According to hospital personnel, the little girl downed two ounces of formula “very fast” and fell asleep. She is now in the care of the Children, Youth and Families Department.